Tuesday, January 20, 2015

Questionable Parenting


Isla has become an absolute mess during her tantrums. There are times when I have to walk into the garage and let out a primal scream just to keep from effing losing it. You don't do that? Oh. Well, gold star for you.

Isla has an insanely wild and curly mullet. I use a spray bottle with water to mist her curls in the morning so she doesn't go to school looking like a hot mess. A couple nights ago she lost her shit because I wouldn't let her wipe her nose with the same tissue she just used to wipe her ass! I'm pretty carefree on most helicopter momisms, but HERE is where I draw the line! We've had too many cases of pink eye in the last two years to go willingly wiping our faces with feces! She was screaming, thrashing, hitting me, throwing everything she could reach...and then. I. Snapped. I silently snatched up that water bottle and sprayed that little monster right in her grill - yup, I did it. I sprayed my sweet baby in the face with a light mist of water. I think we were both shocked. She stopped crying and just looked at me - and then she laughed.

Fast forward to this morning. Victor was trying to wrestle her into her socks and she wasn't having it. Enter complete meltdown. I grabbed the spray bottle and pumped a nice dose of shut the eff up at her and...she laughed. Victor looked at me like I'd lost my mind. Maybe I have, or maybe I've found that water training my toddler will instantly stop manic meltdowns - time will tell...however, after screaming "I potty" for 30 minutes tonight during dinner, my husband looked at me and said. "Where's the water bottle?" Welcome to the dark side my love.

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